THE YEAR'S BEST [actual] HEADLINES

[leprechaun_40]

Crack Found on
Governor's Daughter
[imagine that!]

Something Went Wrong in Jet Crash, Expert Says
[no, really?]

Police Begin Campaign to Run Down Jaywalkers
[now that's taking things a bit far!]


Is There a Ring of Debris around Uranus?
[not if I wipe thoroughly!]

Panda Mating Fails;
Veterinarian Takes Over
[what a guy!]

Miners Refuse to Work after Death
[no-good-for-nothin' lazy so-and-sos!]


Juvenile Court to Try Shooting Defendant
[see if that works any better than a fair trial!]

War Dims Hope for Peace
[I can see where it might have that effect!]

If Strike Isn't Settled Quickly, It May Last Awhile
[you think?!]

Cold Wave Linked
to Temperatures
[who would have thought!]


Enfield (London ) Couple Slain; Police
Suspect Homicide
[they may be on to something!]


Red Tape Holds
Up New Bridges
[you mean there's something stronger than duct tape?!]


Man Struck By Lightning: Faces Battery Charge
[he probably IS the battery charge!]


New Study of Obesity Looks for Larger
Test Group
[weren't they fat enough?!]

Astronaut Takes
Blame for Gas
in Spacecraft
[That's what he gets for eating those beans!]

Kids Make Nutritious
Snacks
[They taste like chicken?]

Local High School
Dropouts Cut in Half
[Chainsaw Massacre all over again!]

Hospitals are Sued
by 7 Foot Doctors
[Boy, are they tall!]


And the winner is....

Typhoon Rips Through Cemetery; Hundreds Dead

[cwin]

[BadDriver]

Typical journalism. Or is that journalism at it's best?

[zybch]

Without the date and newpaper title they come from, I'd say most of those are complete bollocks.
I've seen a couple of them though.

[mireland]

Without the date and newpaper title they come from, I'd say most of those are complete bollocks.
I've seen a couple of them though.

regardless if they're real or not..they're funny...

[ShadeZeRO]

Its funny becuase its true...haha

[JacksterMan]

Is there a ring of debris around Uranus?

LOL

hey, what happened to the smileys and avatars?