Telling kids there is no Santa

[Aleph1]

I have no kids, I'm 17 =P But I thought this might be a good topic.

My mom's friend's daughter is 14 and STILL thinks there is a Santa Clause. Her mom is too scared to tell her there isnt. I think that is soooooo wrong, cuz she gets made fun of at skool for it too.

[codybear]

Once upon a time there was a real man who traveled the world and gave away presents to deserving children everywhere he went. You will find him in many lands with different names, but what he had in his heart was the same in every language. In America we call him Santa Claus. He is the spirit of unconditional love and the desire to share that love by giving presents from the heart. When you get to a certain age, you come to realize that the real Santa Claus is not the guy who comes down your chimney on Christmas Eve. The real life and spirit of this magical elf lives forever in your heart, my heart and all the hearts and minds of all people who believe in the joy that giving to others brings. The real spirit of Santa becomes what you can give rather that what you get. Once you understand this and it becomes a part of you, Christmas becomes even more exciting and more magical because you come to realize the magic comes from you when Santa lives in your heart.

When young people are trusted with this knowledge they become part of a special group of people. They can share in the joy of Christmas from then on, every day of the year, not only on Christmas. This is one of the most important things that can happen in their life, because now they know that Santa Claus cannot exist without people just like them.

[Ed_S]

Beautifully stated, Tom.
Thanks.

[Szech]

I thought there was a Santa Clause until I was 12. The thing is, that my mother kind of forgot to tell me past any certain age what was going on. I just remember I was talking about him at dinner one night, and she said, "Oh yeah, I forgot to tell you, there's no such thing." What a shock!

[TechJumper]

I am 14 years old, and still believe in Santa

While I may not believe that a jolly old man comes into my house every christmas, like cb said, there truly was a 'Santa' who gave gold nickles to families all over,,,I believe it was Rome, Athens, or England, who were needy. His real occupation was a chimney sweep, which is how he came to know the city from above.

When I say I believe in Santa, I believe that Santa's story and spirit lives on in our family, bringing even more fun and joy to the holidays, adding to the true meaning of Christmas.

Michael

[Win_98]

But us adult want the kid to believe there is a santa claus. well you know kid, they'll believe anything we say. Once I turn out the light and said the ghost is coming. They started freaking out. Just so they run upstair and go to sleep so they did. Pretty smart of me huh?

[BBA]

I think Kids should be told kid stuff at young ages...and then told the truth and reason behind the kid stuff you used to tell them as soon as they reach an age of comprehension. I don't mean being cold hearted about it either.

Seems the only fair way to do it..then again, I have no kids of my own yet...

[GroundZero3]

Wait wait wait wait hold up a sec theres no santa? WTF? I see no reason why its a problem for her to believe in santa still. To bad kids love to make fun of others. its a shame.

JaYsin

[Aleph1]

Believing in the spirit Santa brings the holidays is fine, no problem there. It's just that I think its bad to never tell a kid that there is no actual, physical fat guy in a red suit.

[wyvrn]

Telling kids there is a Santa is the same as lying to them. If you want to tell them the story of Santa Claus and incorperte that into the Christmas spirit, then I see no problem with it. But I see no practical use in the Santa Claus lie anymore.

[oblivion]

Hmm I wonder if I will tell my kids that there is a santa at all....maybe I will just tell them that it is a time to share love and gifts with one another.......rather then telling them some fat man is gonna come and bring them whatever they want........

Or hell I may just go with the santa thing.

[Ygor]

Once most kids discover the tv, there is no escaping Santa this time of year.

The New York Times once published an editorial response to a Virginia... "Yes Virginia, there is a Santa Claus..."

So just go with that until they start to catch on. Let them have that special innocence and trust. It's likely some kid at school will burst their balloon, but hopefully not before 4th grade.

Later they'll learn that life has no Sanity Clause and the fun begins again!

[Joel Kleppinger]

Whaddya mean? I thought Tim Allen was Santa Claus (I even saw the documentary they did a couple years back).

BBA, I would have to disagree somewhat with the approach you suggest. It is my opinion that one of the highest values we can adhere to is honesty. So telling a child something that you know to be completely false contradicts what you expect of them (respect for the truth you speak).

Better instead would be to simply give out only the amount of information it would take to satisfy their curiosity. Be honest, but also as vague as the kid will let you be. This way one day the child doesn't have to unlearn what's wrong and think worse of you for it (although, admittedly the damage would likely be pretty slim in this instance).

I've never "believed" in Santa simply because my parents didn't feel the need to go there. Sure, there was still some "Santa stuff" around the house for Christmas, but it wasn't the focus. I always knew where my gifts came from, and I don't see any problem with that. I guess I was more amazed than anything when I found out that my peers would actually believe that their stuff came from somewhere "at the North Pole." My parents bought mine, and I knew their parents bought theirs.

An easy way to tell someone that should know better is simply to leave the reciepts for their gifts laying around somewhere visible a day or two after Christmas.

[brandon184]

Joel,

Telling a kid there is a Santa while they are young, is something that gets the engines running. It fuels their imagination.

Depriving a child of imaginative stories and tales is not a good idea, and I would reccomend against it.

I feel there is a HUGE difference between telling a mainly religously based myth to a child, and lying to them. That's like saying that telling a child a fictional bedtime story is lying to them.

And, by the time a child is near/at/past ages of double digits, they have often developed a "common sense" to realize that it is a myth. Or, they can be told that it is a myth.


- Brandon

[Thud]

My feeling on the matter is that it's all nothing but a good piece of childrens' fiction. I (and I suspect many other folks) grew up on lots of different stories, like Dr Seuss, Clifford the Dog, Mother Goose, Aesop, Winnie the Pooh, etc. As a kid, these stories, like Santa, the Easter Bunny, et al., were very much real. I feel I gained a lot from these stories, with a decent imagination being toward the top of the list.

I might also add that I've never met ANYONE who claimed to be mad at their parents for telling them these "lies" when they were children. The way I see it, if these people actually do exist, they'd also be upset over the existence of fictional books--or "stories", if you will. "All lies", I suspect they'd say.

One could also argue (without trying to steer this into a gnarly religous debate) the same about Jesus, and/or the Bible. I know many adults who believe in, but have never met Jesus. Does that make their faith any weaker? I don't think so. It's no weaker than the child's belief in Santa. I think it's all based much less in the tangible, and very much more in the SPIRIT of what they (Santa, Jesus, etc.) are all about.

~Edit- I also agree with caddmannq- There comes a time when people shoud help their kids differentiate between fiction and reality. And I mean regarding all the different aspects of life, not just Santa.




[This message has been edited by Thud (edited 12-16-2000).]