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  1. #1
    Ultimate Member
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    Aug 1999
    Location
    Jasper, Ga
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    2,323

    Lightbulb I am getting sick of the lack of grammar on this site!

    Here are some rules for better writing:

    1. Verbs HAS to agree with their subjects.
    2. Prepositions are not words to end sentences with.
    3. And don't start a sentence with a conjunction.
    4. It is wrong to ever split an infinitive.
    5. Avoid cliches like the plague. (They're old hat)
    6. Also, always avoid annoying alliteration.
    7. Be more or less specific.
    8. Parenthetical remarks (however relevant) are (usually) unnecessary.
    9. Also too, never, ever, use repetitive redundancies.
    10. No sentence fragments.
    11. Contractions aren't necessary and shouldn't be used.
    12. Foreign words and phrases and bon mots are not apropos.
    13. Do not be redundant; do not use more words than necessary; it's highly superfluous.
    14. One should NEVER generalize.
    15. Comparisons are as bad as cliches.
    16. Don't use no double negatives.
    17. Eschew ampersands & abbreviations, etc.
    18. One-word sentences? Eliminate.
    19. Analogies in writing are like feathers on a snake.
    20. The passive voice is to be ignored.
    21. Eliminate commas, that are, not necessary. Parenthetical words however should be enclosed in commas.
    22. Never use a big word when a diminutive one would suffice.
    23. Kill all exclamation points!!!
    24. Use words correctly, irregardless of how others use them.
    25. Understatement is always the absolute best way to put forth earth shaking ideas.
    26. Use the apostrophe in it's proper place and omit it when its not needed.
    27. Eliminate quotations. As Ralph Waldo Emerson said, "I hate quotations. Tell me what you know."
    28. If you've heard it once, you've heard it a thousand times: Resist hyperbole; not one writer in a million can use it correctly.
    29. Puns are for children, not groan readers.
    30. Go around the barn at high noon to avoid colloquialisms.
    31. Even IF a mixed metaphor sings, it should be derailed.
    32. Who needs rhetorical questions?
    33. Exaggeration is a billion times worse than understatement.



  2. #2
    SysOpt
    Guest

    Lightbulb

    haha

  3. #3
    Ultimate Member
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    Aug 1999
    Location
    Jasper, Ga
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    2,323

    Lightbulb

    im serious people who dont use punctuation are the wurst offenders

  4. #4
    Insane Member Warthog's Avatar
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    Oct 1999
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    Vermont, USA
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    Lightbulb

    Did you make this up?

    Warthog

  5. #5
    Ultimate Member
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    Jasper, Ga
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    Lightbulb

    No, its part of a Mensa bulletin that was passed out about, 20 years ago Still very relevant though IMO.

  6. #6
    Insane Member Warthog's Avatar
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    Lightbulb

    Yes, very relevant. But most of the time, I understand what the other person is saying despite grammatical errors.

    Warthog

  7. #7
    Member RCN_Moose's Avatar
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    Dec 1999
    Location
    Victoria, BC, Canada
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    396

    Wink

    Do they even teach grammer in school anymore?

    Moose

  8. #8
    Member
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    Jul 1999
    Location
    Fairbanks, Ak. USA
    Posts
    117

    Lightbulb

    That is the kind of post up with which I will not put.

  9. #9
    Insane Member Warthog's Avatar
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    Oct 1999
    Location
    Vermont, USA
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    3,512

    Lightbulb

    I just finished 10th grade high school. We spent about 1 1/2 weeks on grammar. I had to learn certain parts all over again because I had not been taught about it since 5th/6th grade. Fortunately I read many books so I wasn't a complete stranger to writing etiquette.

    Warthog

  10. #10
    Banned
    Join Date
    Mar 2000
    Location
    sioux city IA USA
    Posts
    840

    Cool

    Verbs HAS... ??? That's a good place to start.

    BTW., thanks, I'm gonna save that there thing, fer posteriors.

    [This message has been edited by akaBruno (edited 06-20-2000).]

  11. #11
    KMA
    Join Date
    Nov 1999
    Location
    South Florida
    Posts
    4,067

    Lightbulb

    POW POW !!| |//._
    I killed it11..


    [This message has been edited by jad1097 (edited 06-20-2000).]

  12. #12
    Ultimate Member
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    Oct 1999
    Location
    Lincoln, NE USA
    Posts
    1,398

    Lightbulb

    3. And don't start a sentence with a conjunction.
    Whoops!

  13. #13
    Member
    Join Date
    Jul 1999
    Location
    North Carolina, USA
    Posts
    465

    Lightbulb

    sheesh, some people..

    [This message has been edited by oxOGradiusOxo (edited 06-20-2000).]

  14. #14
    Member
    Join Date
    Apr 2000
    Location
    UK
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    116

    Lightbulb

    I also fink it's real bad how people don't spell and put their words right on dis fing.


  15. #15
    Ultimate Member
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    Oct 1999
    Location
    Lincoln, NE USA
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    1,398

    Lightbulb

    Good call, Gradius, I guess I just wasn't paying attention funny stuff

    [This message has been edited by narayan (edited 06-20-2000).]

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