Why is my divorce taking so long?

[excelscior]

17 month ago I filed for divorce from my ex-wife of 7 years. I live in California and I did not use an attorney or legal counsel. The only exception is I used a free service the courts provide here to educate the public on how to file correctly. I paid $210.00 for the filing. I had my ex check on the status 3 months ago. She gave me a paper the courts gave to her that our divorce would be heard sometime soon. No specific date given, but that it would take approx. an hour. It was signed by her an a witness and she kept one copy and I eventually got one in the mail. Now it's 20 months plus and no letter from the courts to give me a specific time or date for our divorce. Why is this taking so long? I tried saving money filing this myself and I did. But is this what happens when a person does not use an attorney? Is this common? If anyone out there has experience on this please let me know. I would greatly appreciate it. Thanks...Happy new year all!!!!!! Laterz!!!!!:t

[gjimene2]

I don't know, never been married.


I think on the last divorce that Billforce had only took a single round of his 45cal.

[Bovon]

I really don't have a clue, and this is only an opinion, partially backed up by hearsay from people who know the law profession and from input from council over the years.

The courts (judges) do not care too much for people who try a "do it yourself" action. Judges and lawyers are a close knit group. Even tho, some judge and some attorney may not work well in court, they do not like others butting in...kinda like two brothers..always fighting each other, but will never allow someone else to fight the other one.

Anyway, a lawyer would have the expertise to get your case on the docket.. you don't, and the court continues to put your case on the back burner...possibly until you retain an attorney to get it heard...thereby, satisfying the 'profession' that individuals cannot handle a legal problem by themselves.

Is your ex realizing any benefits from this being dragged on and on?...does she have an attorney? Will she be better off after the divorce than she is now? Are there children?...will you pay more or less alimony/child support after the divorce is final than you are now?..

There may be reasons for the delay that she has had input on that you are not aware of.

[leprechaun_40]

Not sure why it's taking yours so long but I know that in Colorado it's 90 days for the do it yourself divorce. You file, they tell you that you have to take a parenting course ( if kids are involved ) and agree on the division of property, period. Once the 90 days is up you are scheduled and appear in front of a judge. He determines child support ( if any ) and sees whether the division of property is correct. My actual hearing took about 45 minutes, over and done.

I think I'd be asking the courthouse what's going on here, it shouldn't be taking this long to get on the docket for this.

[j.m@talk]

Ummmmmmmmmm

Just Shoot Her!

Much cheaper :p

[mireland]

Originally posted by j.m@talk21.com
Ummmmmmmmmm

Just Shoot Her!

Much cheaper :p


http://www.fancysplace.com/smileys/eeksmile.gif

[Charlie2]

Good things are always worth waiting for!

[excelscior]

If we had no child and shooting an ex was legal. I think I'd blow her a new one between her snot rag! Anways....I'm going today to find out why it's taken so long. As far as custody, I asked for 50% of the time versus the 10% of the time I get now. My ex will be in far worse shape without me than with me. As far as alimony well she has declined to take any. But thats because I promised her not to mention anything about her property she owns in Peru. I'll see whats up with this garbage.

[gjimene2]

Property in Peru?

No Alimony?

Even trade :)

[DVOM]

I don't think your wife is giving you the entire straight story.

Voice of experience here.

This must be your first divorce.

[gjimene2]

If she's cheating on him, so what? As long as it's a quick, clean divorce. That's all that matters.

[DVOM]

gjimene2, if you're talking to me, I guess I didn't make my suspicions clear.

I think she's the one creating the delay.

For one thing he's asking for 50% custody. That would give him an equal vote when it comes to child rearing issues. I've never met a woman that would go for that kind of power split when it comes to the children. They want total control over the situation. And it's not just a question of controlling the kids, it's also a question of control over the father. If you've got complete control over the kids, you've also got complete control over what the father can do.

It would also mean no child support awarded to her in my state.

And as far as "cheating on him" goes, a possible problem is maybe she hasn't found anyone to "cheat" with yet. Alot of women want a new man in place before they'll let the old one go.

[gjimene2]

My Bad, still a clean divorce is good.


You won't believe what kind of trouble she would get for having that extra land in Peru. The government could be down her throat.

[j.m@talk]

Time to go to New Yoyk & getta Hot Piece :cool:

I'm talking weaponry here :mad: